my barest soul, episode 7
During my brief absence, many things occcured. Let me try to organise things and type them here...My laptop was down, but my friend repaired it for me. After that, it could work, but I could not get online, so I went to get a new modem (after two visits to Singtel who told me I need not get a new modem because I have my old modem but I lost the installation CD-rom...and they thought somehow that would work, but it did not, so in the end, I still got a new modem.)
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I shall yet again start from zero, or scratch, or nothing.
Life is a process. Here, I congratulate myself on having reached thus far -- here.
I must be ready to die each day, I must be ready to suffer each day. But even more so, I must be ready to LIVE each day, and live it well, like never before.
I am so ignorant, but it never felt so good to know that I am ignorant.
I am a zero-artist. I always start from zero. I do nothing. I achieve nothing.
I am an artist. I draw.
Thinking IS form.
...I am weak and tired from flu. The weather has turned cooler. A window view seat is priceless.
From Thoreau's 'Walking': If you are ready to leave father and mother, and brother and sister, and wife and child and friends, and never see them again, -- if you have paid your debts, and made your will, and settled all your affairs, and are a free man, then you are ready for a walk. ... I think that I cannot preserve my health and spirits, unless I spent four hours a day at least -- and it is commonly more than that, -- sauntering through the woods and over the hills and fields, absolutely free from worldly engagements.
There is no rush.
'The True Man of No Title'...what a worthless label! Art is art, work is work, and life is life.
I need to look beyond Chinese painting. Shi Tao will be the last (unfortunately, after I wrote this, I could not find any cheap portable books on him). Besides Chinese art and Western art, there is a lot a lot more...
A NEW WAY OF LIFE. I've decided to adhere to a very strict and healthy diet of vegetables, fruits, and bread. I am going on a minimum (or totally abstain from) for chicken, pork, fish, eggs, and even milk. That is the surest possible way to a long life. Such a diet is known to cure diseases (even cancer and certain kidney problems). I do not intend to elaborate here, but basically I have generally (not completely) lost faith in Western treatment and medicine and I am becoming a vegeterian. Talk to me in person if you want to know more about this drastic move.
Sample meals I had:
1) 2 slices of bread, a cup of green apple juice
2) 1 pineapple pie, 1 yam pie, 1 peanut pancake, 1 soy drink
3) brown rice, green vegetables
4) white rice and vegeterian dishes, soy drink
Today's lunch:
1 green apple, 1 orange, a few slices of guava, a bunch of grapes
Today's dinner:
1 walnut bread, 1 milk (I had no choice, Mum still has a few packets of milk in the fridge that I have to finish)
One must move from a meat diet to a vegeterian diet, then to 1/3 raw diet (i.e. eat raw carrots, eat raw vegetables, eat more fruits), then eventually learn to abstain from eating (i.e. fast).
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I did a decent sketch at West Coast park today. Generally, I'm okay.
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